i JUST deleted all the msgs in my phone
coz it cant fkin hold that many in :(
i used to filter it so that i deleted all the msgs i felt werent worth keeping
but now its at a stage where most of what's in there.. i wanted to keep

but anyway.. they were good memories. great memories actually.
especially the smses from time to time from nathalie
the many many random ones i got from vanessa, even ones just about her average day.
ones with ppl like josh, leo, klau, nick, hazi, kaushal around the exam period and generally during the whole academic year
the funny ones darius would send about how boring the class was, or the ones about how his mum's being annoying
the one worded or 3 pages long smses from lillian, some so colourful, yet describing such subtle things in life like the green of the grass, the warmth of the morning, etc. e.g. "Ladida~" or "Victor! Victor! Victor...?" or "two strangers off to see the world, there's such a lot of world to see. wan an bao bei" or "it will feel so weird knowing that you will be writing from halfway across the world"
more recently, the smses with my friends in msia; amanda, ivin, weishin, jamie, afina etc. (n.b. i already deleted messages from the first half of the year. my last noted sms was from all my friends going "swine flu?" when i became sick during that season)
and even smses with new people ive met, or ppl im just becoming close to or taken an interest to :)


im kinda sad i had to delete them all. the smses were there as a kind of objective artefact of the memories of 2009 and some of 2010.. they could not be tainted.
but anyway, as much as i treasure them.. i'm gona have to let them go. besides, im gona fill these gaps, or, replace these old ones, with better memories.

i guess this is my way of writing to myself, reflecting on the great great times i've had over the whole year.. and epecially the people i have become close to. and not in any particular order at all...
lily, amanda, nathalie, vanessa, leo, jamie, kenneth, kaushal, darius, asiri, hazi, kelly, tim, paul, rahul, david, nicky, nick, josh, shaoping, weishin, ivin, penny, jinrui, jason, afina, courtney, josh teng, mayling, natasya, vinny, winny
just some names that popped up in my sms scrolling just then.

off to bed.

when are u gona grow the fuck up?


<3
lldanikjkjkaapvwsn

oh and another note to self:
good gary.

note to self:
dont make decisions you will regret again. think it through you douche.

one more day of school left. wow.